Magic

I was going to sit down and write a completely miserable and whiney post as I usually do, lamenting over the pathetic state of my non-existent love life. Then I remembered: I don't give a damn! Haha, silly me. Old habits die hard, I guess.

I've been on a mission for the past few weeks. Literally, since I joined the gym. I go almost every other day, and I work out. It's completely unattractive and I sweat like no one's business, but I, again, don't give a damn. I'm determined to lose all my extra weight (already am down a kilo), and become the hottest creature in the world. I will also be ruthless- and crush men's dream until I am finally satisfied. There are various aspects to my plan:

1. Minimize my calorie intake, and just eat better in general. More veggies!
2. Work out regularly.
3. Continue in idolizing Cristina Hendricks.
4. That includes my new dye job which will occur upon my arrival at home...
5. Go tanning. But only a little. Just so my tummy isn't so pasty pale.
6. Buy clothes that really suit me.

Yup. It'll take months, and it'll be a real ordeal- but I am determined. I feel like I have something to prove, to many people. I won't elaborate on whom, but there are quite a few individuals. And they're going to EAT THEIR WORDS. Maniacal? Yes, very much so.

"Everyone knows, I've got the magic in me."

byeee!

Forget You

Sometimes, we have to accept reality. Accept things we don't want to believe, even though we secretly know they're true. It's heartbreaking at times, but it's how it must be.

I've got to be honest with myself, and realize the world isn't the beautiful, romantic and hopeful thing I want it to be. Granted, there are things that are those things, but there are also things that aren't. And I need to learn to live with them, and stop defending those people that take advantage of my nature. I need to focus on bettering myself now- the rest of the world needs to wait.

That aside, I've discovered a delightfully easy and new way to make cookies. It's so simple, and the result is absolutely incredible. All you need is sugar, butter, flour and chopped up chocolate. It's the best! All you do is put in the same amount of butter and sugar, then just keep adding little bits of flour until you have a soft dough ball. Then you fold in the chocolate and bake it at around 350 degrees (fahrenheit). Don't worry- I'm going to the gym tomorrow to burn it off!

Now, I've decided to end each post with a quote from a song I'm listening to you that relates to my mood at the moment:

"There's pain in my chest, but I still wish you the best."

so long!

Ticket Outta Loserville

Sigh.

I'm very fed up with certain individuals here. I'm fed up with the fact I can barely trust anyone not to twist my words and start major drama.

So immature. Here I was thinking high school was over. But this time, it's 6 hours and $700 away from home; without my childhood friends to back me up; and on my own. It's the best. I'm a pretty easy target. Too nice (outwardly, anyway); American; have no friends prior to coming to Aberdeen; amongst other things.

I'm tired. I need to go home and re-charge. It's exactly three weeks now until I fly home to New York. I never thought I'd ever miss the USA. EVER. It's funny how much people change. I'm almost hesitant to see my old friends again, but I guess it would be weird if they remained exactly the same. I'm excited. All this stupid drama here can't slow me down. I'm just going to avoid the idiots, and keep on moving.

To the gym, specifically. I'm in love with it. I think because it's so advanced and cool, it just makes me enjoy sweating (gross) and working out (ick). There that, and I'm a bit of a masochist. FEEL THE BURN!

That's about it. g'night!

Won't Go Home Without You

I went to the gym today to do my first official workout. I went on the elliptical machine for 30 minutes at a 5 mile an hour pace the entire time. For a fat slob such as myself, this was absolutely brutal. I was the only one sweating this much, as I think the boys were only there to lift weights, and the girls only seemed to be interested in looking at the boys. And there I was, running away and sweating like a pig. I was an attractive sight, let me tell you!

It's been snowing non-stop here. Well, it stops every few hours, but then it resumes. Now, there's a serious amount of snow everywhere. I really don't feel like walking to campus through Seaton Park... it'll be slippery, and I'll probably fall on my ass. Not fun. Then I'm going to visit a friend at her flat, and I have no idea how I'm going to get there. Or if I can, for that matter. This weather is pretty rough.

I'm exhausted... and I just woke up. I don't really have much else to say, LOL. bye!

coeur du pirate

Confidence: maybe not as strong, but still going. I'm not giving up on it.

I recently joined the local gym. I have my 'induction' tomorrow, where I learn to use all of the really fancy equipment. I'm super excited! I'm really determined to lose some weight before I go home at Christmas. I have lots of people to impress! Granted, since coming here, I haven't gained any weight. But I haven't lost any either. It' just been steady. Which is probably why I've grown to love my body so much.

However, there's always room for improvement. And who can really say no to losing a few pounds when it's really needed? I do need to get in shape, for my health. That, and it gives me something to do. I always have so much spare time at university, and I should actually do something productive with it, right? Right.

I'm so happy right now, for such a pathetic reason. Ha. I'm such a sucker for love. I always have been. I don't know why, when I devote so much time to my 'anti-love' exterior. I'm the Queen of the Saps.

Anyway, need my energy for my gym induction! good night!